


Skeletons in the Closet

by Madame_Xela



Series: The Brothers Ri drabbles [5]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Blood, Childbirth, Depression, F/M, Gen, M/M, Minor Character Death, Orphans, Premature Birth, Self Harm, Some Fluff, Starvation, child neglect (?), will add more tags in later chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-01-13
Packaged: 2018-03-07 12:20:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3173594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madame_Xela/pseuds/Madame_Xela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every year at midsummer Adad started stocking the house for the winter. Ori never understands why, all he knows is that once Adad starts stocking, every bit of extra money goes to the winter supply. He gets no more sweet treats but he doesn’t get why.<br/>“Adad! It’s just a couple of biscuits!” <br/>“I said no, Ori.”<br/>When he asks Nori about it, his brother presses a biscuit in his hand (don’t tell Adad or Papa) and says Adad just wants them to have enough to eat. When Ori asks why they have to start so early, Nori only smiles sadly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Look what I found in my docs! Angst!   
> Also: NOT DEAD!!

Every year at midsummer Adad started stocking the house for the winter. Ori never understands why, all he knows is that once Adad starts stocking, every bit of extra money goes to the winter supply. He gets no more sweet treats but he doesn’t get _why_.

“Adad! It’s just a couple of biscuits!”

“I said no, Ori.”

When he asks Nori about it, his brother presses a biscuit in his hand (don’t tell Adad or Papa) and says Adad just wants them to have enough to eat. When Ori asks why they have to start so early, Nori only smiles sadly.

*

_Dori never liked Nori and Ori’s father. He was crude and a drunk and always seemed to have some sort of trouble following him._

_But Mama liked something about him. Maybe it was how he liked drawing picture of her and the boys all the time. Maybe it was because he couldn’t hold a tune to save his life. Whatever the reason was, she was hopelessly in love with the bum. He was her sun and stars._

_And then one day her sun went out and her stars disappeared._

_He left in the middle of the night, not even bothering to leave a note. Mama, stomach starting to swell with little Ori (the name she had her heart set on if she had a girl-and she was certain it would be a girl that time), cried and cursed and accidentally knocked down a wall. It was the one that connected her room to the rest of the house. She cursed her strength and worried about the amount of money it would take to fix it._

_*_

_Mama’s job didn’t pay much, so when Nori’s father left so their household income took a large hit. Mama tried her hardest. Saved every extra copper piece she could. But Dori knew it wasn’t enough. He got a job working for an extremely old dwarf at his tea shop, but the building was a mess and Dori’s employer couldn’t make anything other than hot leaf juice. Needless to say, Dori’s extra few coppers didn’t help much._

_*_

_It was that winter that they would come to realize just how severe their situation was._

_Once the cold set in, frost and snow soon followed._


	2. Chapter 2

_It wasn’t too bad at first. Mama and Dori pulled the mattresses out of the bedrooms to make one big sleeping mat in front of the stove. While Mama cooked dinner Dori and Nori arranged some of the blankets and furs to make a fort of sorts._

_Mama came in later, her red braids frizzy and coming undone, with three bowls of soup in her hands. “Look a’ you two. This is wonderful!” Nori (not quite an adult yet, but too old to be a child) grinned._

_“Dori did all the tall stuff, but I did everything else!”_

_“Well it looks wonderful.”_

_*_

_Dori doesn’t know what’s worse: walking about in the freezing weather in his worn clothes, or coming home to a house that isn’t much warmer than outdoors._

_Mama tried her best. She knitted any spare wool into outerwear for him and Nori but they were not enough to chase the chill from their bones (And Dori ended up giving most of his to Nori anyway). Mama cried at night, thinking her boys fast asleep as she cuddled them to her sides for warmth (neither slept)._

_*_

_Dori remembers-just barely-the winters in Erebor. Of the snow that blanketed the mountain and the neighboring city of Dale in fluffy layers. But there had been money enough to keep the streets and bridge clear and safe for travelers, so Mama and Da would take Dori through Dale and let him totter about in the snow mounds._

_In Ered Luin there wasn’t enough money for that. Dwarrows shoveled in front of their homes, and a few of the kinder ones like Mister Bifur and Bofur (and even Mister Dwalin) shoveled the roads. But what was not hidden under piles of white and brown snow was slick and icy. And someone was bound to be hurt._

_It should have been Dori, for his younger bones could bounce back much faster than his Mama’s, and he could handle the pain better than Nori. But though it should have been him, it was not. Nori had slipped after bring Dori a meagre lunch of cram, dried beef, and watery tea and had broken his leg._

_He had said that he did not blame Dori, for he should have paid more attention to the ground, but Dori did. And so he told the old dwarf that he worked for that he would be taking a few weeks off to care for his brother._

_Part of him screams not to, that they needed the money more-and how much trouble can Nori really get into alone at home? He didn’t listen._

_*_

_It’s hard to say when exactly their food supply started running low because Dori wasn’t in charge of the cooking, despite his protests. Everything seemed good, too good in fact. They had three meals a day, albeit small ones; and that bothered Dori because he knew that by now there shouldn’t have been that much food left._

_So he watched Mama cook when he should have been watching Nori. She didn’t notice him which was good because Dori saw what she didn’t want him to. He sees her reach her hand out of the window and puts a scoop of snow into her bowl of soup, giving the boys the thicker, more filling bowls._

_He had tried swapping their bowls when Mama wasn’t looking, but all it had earned him was a slap upside the head and an order to finish his dinner._

_“I want you to enjoy this, Dori.” She tells him cryptically._

_Dori just replied with ‘what about the babe?’ Mama didn’t have an answer._

_*_

_Nori’s leg healed faster than Dori had thought it would. But with it came bills for the healer. Mama’s job didn’t pay enough for that so Dori goes back to the old dwarf with the tea shop and begs for a raise.  The dwarf only agrees after hearing that Mama is pregnant, and even then Dori is only getting paid half a (small) handful of silver coins and half a (small) handful of coppers._

_They can pay Óin, but they won’t have enough money for food for a week or two._

_One bowl of watery soup turns into three and soon the watery soup turns into melted snow with a bit of seasoning._

_*_

_They were all hungry. Flavored water and mushy cram could only do so much for their stomachs._

_Nori didn’t quite understand that though they were hungry, they couldn’t eat more than what Mama had rationed because they didn’t have enough money yet to get more._

_“Mama I’m hungry.”_

_“I know, love.”_

_“Can you make roast beef for dinner?”_

_“No, love.”_

_“Why?” She doesn’t have the heart to tell him that a slab of beef-of any size-was more than they could afford. So she tells him that all of Ered Luin’s cattle must be saved through the winter so that young dwarflings have milk to drink. “Oh. Can I have a sandwich then?”_

_Mama cries herself to sleep that night._


	3. Chapter 3

_Though Dori never spoke of his home life after begging for a raise, his employer could see that there was something wrong with Dori and corners him until Dori breaks. He spoke of the meals that offer no nourishment, of the constant fear for his mother and the babe that grows inside her, and the worry for Nori. Not once does he say that he is hungry-even though it is plainly obvious that he is-because he is the eldest and must take care of his little family._

_Now, Dori’s employer might have been old and grumpy, but he was in no way mean or cruel. Taking pity on his young employee, he took out his bacon sandwich and told Dori to eat it all. (He did not miss Dori splitting the sandwich and pocketing the other half)_

_At the end of the day, the old dwarf bundled what little was left of the day’s pastries (a scone, two muffins, and a few biscuits) in a handkerchief and gave it to Dori._

_It felt good eating something other than cram and flavored water for once._

_*_

_Just like Dori had, Mama had grown weak. Perhaps more so than himself. She claimed it was the babe making her more tired, and she would get better soon. He could see through her lie and he_ knew _._

_They would be lucky if she made it to spring, let alone get through the full term of her pregnancy._

_*_

_By the time the spring thaw comes along Mama had to leave her job and she could barely get out of bed for she was so weak._

_They live on Dori’s meagre pay and what little amount of treats that are left at the tea shop at the end of the day. But it’s not enough. The boys emerge from their home one warm spring morning looking like skeletons. No one says anything because there are several others who share a similar fate, but there is a pity in their eyes that makes Dori walk a little faster and Nori hide his face in his hip._


	4. Chapter 4

When the first chill of winter sets in Dori has Ori wrapped in so many layers that it’s a wonder he can even move.

Papa Balin lets him peel off a few layers behind Dori’s back, but there always seems to be more layers to replace them.

And Mahal forbid he gets sick. Every time Ori catches a cold, Dori makes it seem like he’s dying (which is not a good thing for a child to think).

“’s not fair! Fíli and Kíli don’ suffer through this!”

Nori pats his head.

*

_Spring and summer offer more work, food, and money. Dori’s small pay nearly doubles (and at one point even triples). But though he was receiving more money, their living situation hardly changed. Nori and Mama got more food (something both dwarves protest to) and with the extra nutrition Nori sprouts like a weed and Mama’s belly grows and rounds more. This means more clothes and more visits from Oin which mean the hole in the wall will have to wait to be repaired, clothes for the winter months would have to wait, and anything more for the baby is nothing more than a wistful thought at that point._

_Yet despite their lack of funds, things finally start to look up._

_*_

_Oh how wrong they were._

_Try as they might with food and medicine, Mama was too weak and Oin breaks the news to them that they must prepare to lose her and their new sibling._

_It’s unfair, it’s cruel, it’s a thousand different things all at once and each one causes Dori so much pain it’s like a physical blow to him. He tried so hard, worked until his feet ached and his hands bled for a small sum of money; he was the first to get up in the morning to make sure Nori and Mama got breakfast, and he was the last to go to sleep after coming home from work; he did all of the cleaning and the cooking and the sewing and all the maintenance the house needed so Mama didn’t have to and Nori could be child for just a little while longer. He prayed to Mahal that they would survive or even just one of them (a very small and very selfish part of him wanted his mother to live and the babe to perish, but almost immediately thinking this Dori punished himself by beating a boulder until his hands bled). For it was not fair that they were doomed to die; Mama, whose only crime was falling in love with a dwarf who ran away, and a babe who had not taken its first breath yet…they were to die because Dori could not give them enough nutritious foods to eat…because Dori could not pay to keep them warm in the colder months or properly medicated when they needed to be…They were going to die because Dori had failed._


	5. Chapter 5

_Days blur and suddenly weeks have passed. Mama is an unmoving ghost in her bed. Dori works tirelessly to bring in as much as he can, and he cares for his sick Mama and his angry brother._

_He was angry too, he was so angry. Angry at Nori’s father for running off, angry at Mahal for letting this happen to his Mama, angry at his employer for not paying enough, angry at Oin for not doing enough,  angry at Nori for being able to escape the burden that has fallen on Dori’s shoulders…_

_All of this anger builds up. Every once in a while Dori is allowed a few moments of time where he can escape and vent out this anger (mostly on poor, unsuspecting boulders that have since been turned to rubble). But most of the time his anger festers, escaping in small bursts. He will grab a knife by the blade, or imbed it in the wall, dig his nails into his skin with enough force to make himself bleed, pull at his hair…_

_Mama doesn’t have enough energy to stop him every time, and half the time she doesn’t even notice. This just angers Dori more._

_*_

_A few weeks shy of the first days of summer, the Princess Dís fell pregnant with her first child. Now this did not bother Dori, in fact it gave him a short reprieve from his anger (surprisingly, he was glad that his distant cousin was expecting). Because children are a blessing. It didn’t matter to him whether the families they were born into were rich or poor._

_Unfortunately not all people thought like he._

_Because Oin was related to the royal family and it was the Princess’s first child, he thought it very important to be there for the Princess as much as possible (Dori could respect that). He told Mama and Dori that just because he was going to tend to his kin that it did not mean that he was going to abandon them. He would send a student of his in his stead._

_The student, though young and knowledgeable in his craft, did not like Mama and looked down on her for having yet another child. He charged nearly twice as much as Oin with considerably less time and effort. He did not care when Dori begged him to charge less. He simply sneered and said that if Dori could not afford a healer then his mother should not have gotten pregnant and if it was going to continue to be a problem then he would not return._

_(Nori took back all of the money they had given him that day, without Dori knowing of course.)_

_He did not return._


	6. Chapter 6

Watching Adad blend teas is hypnotic. He can make a tea for anything! Papa Balin is grumpy and has a headache from dealing with cousilmen all day, Adad has a tea ready that has him happy and playing alongside Ori with whatever new toys he has brought home. Dwalin is sore from work, Adad’s tea and biscuits-those are very important-turns him into a pile of mush.

Ori never bothered asking how he got so good at making tea; dwarves have their crafts and making tea was Adad’s.

_*_

_When the tea shop has slow days, Dori experiments. He wasn’t aiming to make something that smelled and tasted good (though he did make one or two) he was trying to make something to help Mama._

_It was hard when most of the ingredients were old and not stored properly. He made do. He got rid of the molded leaves, and blended what he could into a tea for Mama. He had to reheat it when he gave it to her (it made him cringe every time he did it), but it helped even if it was only by a little. She was able to sit up more, laugh more…she seemed to be more_ alive _. And even though she was feeling better, Dori knew that it wouldn’t last. But he would continue to help her for as long as he was able._

_*_

_After hearing how much better Mama was doing, the old shopkeeper set up a system with Dori. Once a day, right before their busiest hours, Dori could make an entire pot of tea for his mother. His wife made a meal (usually stew since it lasted longer) for her and Nori and they would send off the tea and the food with Nori. This system lasted for almost two weeks._

_On one such day the shopkeeper gave Nori the tea and the stew and sent him off as usual. Not thirty minutes later he was back and screaming for his brother._

_“Nori? What’s wrong?!”_

_“Mama-she-”_

_The shopkeeper sent them off with a sad look._


	7. Chapter 7

Ori’s birthdays are the _best_. And it’s not because he’s got so many friends and members of his family to bring him presents or that he can claim to have the royal family over or that his parents throw him a huge party. To him, he would be okay with just getting one present a year; the royal family isn’t _The Royal Family,_ they’re just family; and his parents don’t throw him huge parties.

It starts by waking up in between his parents. He gets up first, but unlike Fee and Kee he waits for his parents to wake up instead of jumping on them. When they get up, Ori gets to braid their hair and beards and they keep them in all day! No-no makes breakfast (bacon, eggs, and sausage and _chips_ ) while Dwalin fights and is beaten by the incredibly strong Ori (and if Adad isn’t looking, Dwalin will hoist up Ori and run around with him on his shoulders). After breakfast, Adad has to go to his shop for a little bit, but Papa gets the whole day off to spend with him! They go and buy some books, they draw together (and Ori is waaaay better than Papa), they play together all day and Ori loves every second of it.

Then just before lunch they make their way to Lady Auntie Dís’s house. She greets him with a gentle forehead tap and a big hug and kiss. He giggles and hugs her back. Mister Thorin is there, ruffling his hair and telling him to stop growing because he is getting far too big (Ori has learned over the years that, though Mister Thorin looks grumpy and tough, he is actually a big softie). Fee and Kee present him with handmade gifts (one of Ori’s favorites was a crudely made set of beads with his name on them) and then the three of them will run outside and play. Adad shows up not long after.

They all have a light lunch and then his parents take Ori home to get ready for later. Papa runs off to get the Ur family (Mister Bombur makes the BEST cakes, and they’re all very nice) and Adad goes about cleaning the already clean house.

No-no and Dwalin come home with presents wrapped in brown paper that Ori mustn’t open until after they’re done eating dinner. Papa and the Ur family show not long after. Mister Bofur swings Ori up as high as he can under Adad’s watchful gaze and Mister Bifur ruffles his hair and hands him a beautifully crafted toy he made just for Ori. Next to arrive is Mister Gloin and his wife and son. Gloin gives him a hug so tight, Ori is almost afraid that his head will pop off his shoulders! His wife hugs Ori less tightly, but with no less amount of love and enthusiasm. Gimli rams their heads together.

Finally the Royal family arrives and they spend the next several hours feasting and dancing and laughing until the little ones fall asleep in a heap. The guests leave and take the laughter with them. Ori is placed in his bed, tucked in tightly and lovingly like every other night. Yet there’s this solemnness as Adad and No-no kiss his brow that Ori can pick up even in his half asleep state. And right before he falls asleep, he swears he hears someone crying.

*

  _A stone settled in Dori’s stomach and it sunk further with every step he took. They don’t speak. The only sound that came from the two brothers was their feet crashing against the ground and their heavy breathing._

_They could hear Mama’s crying before they saw their house. Loud. Pained._

_Dori could remember standing outside Mama’s bedroom when she gave birth to Nori. He remembers her crying and cursing Nori’s father, he remembers how she suffered all day because Nori was (and still is) a stubborn child and did not want to come out. The most important thing Dori remembers about Nori’s birth, though, was that Mama had had a full twelve month gestation with Nori. This babe was only just into the ninth month according to Mama. It was far too early for them to be born._

_They had neither the time nor the money to get a healer, and so with what little knowledge Dori had of childbirth, he made a decision._

_“Nori” Dori spoke at last. “When we get inside, I want you to boil water.”_

_*_

_It was hard to tell how long Mama had been in labor for. She did not give a straight answer, only asked for more water. After hours of her agonizing screams, her pleas turned to something different. Instead of asking for more water, she asked for Dori to take care of Nori._

_“Don’t let ‘im wind up like ‘is father.” She said, her voice slurring the more she babbled. “Don’t let ‘im gamble half yer money away an’ spend th’ rest on drink. I loved ‘im, I still do, jus’ like I still love yer Da. But ‘e ‘ad ‘is weaknesses. Don’ let yer brother follow in ‘is footsteps. Promise, promise me Dori.”_

_“I-I promise.”_

_“Good. Now promise me y’ll take care of th’ babe.”_

_“I promise”_

_She screamed again._


	8. Chapter 8

Ori loved his Adad and No-no, even when they were yelling at each other. He never understood what they were arguing about, only that No-no had done something bad. He had asked Adad once why he couldn’t put No-no in time out for being bad. But Adad said that the only one who could do that was Mama.

“Well where is she, ‘cause I think No-no needs a time out.”

“I agree love. But Mama is far away, and she will not be returned to us.”

*

_Dori had heard from several women that you have to push the babe out (how horrifying). The problem was, he wasn’t quite sure when that was supposed to be. Didn’t it have something to do with the head? When you see it? When it’s out? He wasn’t sure._

_The women never spoke of how much blood there was. Though, he assumed that his mother was losing far too much blood than a normal birth. The mattress was soaked through, the blankets ruined. Nori had to leave to fetch more._

_It was during this time that Dori saw something disturbing. Something covered in blood and some sort of white-ish goo was coming out of Mama._

_“I think you should start pushing now.”_

_“If ye think I should start now, ye hav’n’t  been payin’ attention.” Her voice was weak, and if a scream had not passed her lips seconds later he would have thought it nothing more than a gentle draft._

_“Mama…I don’t…”_

_“I know. Jus’ stay there an’ catch th’ babe when they fall out. An’ rememb’r t’ cut th’ cord.”_

_Oh Mahal._

_*_

_She told him to sit and wait to catch the babe. She told him to sit there, listening to her screams of agony and watching blood escape her at an alarming rate. When Nori came back in Dori made him sit in the corner with his eyes closed and his ears covered. But Nori’s hands couldn’t keep away the screams. And as Dori sat there watching his mother suffer and waiting to catch his new sibling, he watched his dear little brother-his red haired shadow-silently weeping with his eyes squeezed shut and his nails digging into the skin around his ears. He couldn’t ask Nori to leave, as much as he wanted to. He needed an extra set of hands for…after._

_It’s funny, the maker blessed Dori with great strength and yet he was powerless as he watched his family suffer._

_*_

_When the head comes out it looks like a furry, bloody potato. Of course that was just the top of the head. Then came the eyes, the nose, the puffy cheeks…_

_It wasn’t just blood that the babe was covered in. There was thick mucus everywhere and right over their brow was a little bit of…something that Dori picked off. Mama told him to wipe off the face, clear off their nose and mouth. He did so, but the skin was bloodied again before he can take the rag away._

_Time stopped for what seems like hours. The babe didn’t move. Mama kept screaming. Nori kept crying._

_After ages of waiting, Mama gave her loudest scream and the babe’s shoulders were out. The rest of their tiny body slid out so fast that Dori almost didn’t catch them. Yet by some miracle he managed to catch the babe. Another brother. A tiny little boy who was small enough to be cupped in Dori’s hands._

_“It’s a boy Mama.” He whispered._

_Mama wasn’t even breathing._


	9. Chapter 9

_Dori sent his younger brother off to find some milk. While he was gone Dori cut and tied the cord coming out of the babe’s navel. He cleaned off the blood and mucus and wrapped the babe in the only clean cloth they had left._

_They babe was crying softly, not the high pitched wailing of normal newborns. Dori should have been concerned. He should have been glad that the babe was making any noise at all. He should have picked up the babe, should have cuddled him and kissed him and stroked his fuzzy head until Nori came back._

_But he just…couldn’t. Mama was laying three feet away from him, dead in a pool of her own blood because she had just pushed out that baby. Now Dori was alone with two younger brothers he needed to take care of. It just wasn’t_ fair _! If Mama hadn’t gotten pregnant, then she wouldn’t have had to stop working and they would have had enough money for food and she wouldn’t have gotten sick and she would still be there with him!_

_He ignored the babe’s crying._

_*_

_By the time Nori came back with Dori’s boss and his wife (and a goat, bless their hearts) Dori had Mama wrapped in some of the blankets. If you ignored the blood, it looked like she was sleeping._

_Nori yelled something. Dori didn’t hear what it was, but it must have been something about the babe because Nori had him cradled to his chest._

_The three adults set about removing Mama’s body (Dori insisted on helping) and burying her a little ways away._

_“Why must she be so far from us?” Dori asked._

_His boss’s wife smiled sadly and told him that it for his and Nori’s sake that they were doing it. Right._

_*_

Sometimes, Adad and No-no would take him to an unmarked grave and pray.

Well, it’s not any kind for prayers that Ori knows about (and No-no’s silent most of the time anyway, so does it even count?) it’s like they’re talking to an invisible person who doesn’t talk back. Why would they do that?

Adad rambles on about _everything_.  Ori, No-no, Papa and Dwalin, the shop, new beads he’s getting commissioned…

No-no says silly things like ‘I haven’t died yet’ or ‘I only got arrested twice this week, be proud of me.’ But other than that he’s quiet and staring at the stones.

Neither of them says a name though. And when Ori asks about it, Adad will pick him up and nuzzle their foreheads together-or No-no will tickle him until he forgets his question.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end of the pre-written stuff. 
> 
> in case anyone was wondering Dori's around 90 and Nori is in his early to mid sixties


End file.
